I love the getaway idea. This should be baked in to the "reality" of Life on Earth". Your birth certificate comes with 10 free ones, and you can opt in for additional leases during times of fascism and disarray. And divorce.
I have DMV stories I can’t think about today. Too infuriating and they relate to my dead mother who was elderly and disabled and her name not matching her birth certificate. Stop it Mary. I have to get my licensed renewed this year. I did it through the mail last time. Pretty sure I’m going to have to get a new picture since my photo on my license is 18 years old. Damn, I was wanting to look 52 forever. I never informed them I had cataract surgery in 2020 and can now see so if I pass their eye test they can remove that restriction. My state can’t force Real ID to vote and I use my passport for flying so hopefully my little town will make this year’s DMV trip easy. I better put it in my calendar to do early because I will be traveling for my big 70th.
I was shocked it was as easy as it was, Mary. Not that it was easy given…all the things. And I did the Real ID because she assured me it would be easy with voter registration, I guess we will see. I have my original birth certificate (found it in my dad’s stuff) and my passport so I think I should be okay, and it’s the first thing I’m going to verify when it comes in the mail. I’m sorry about your Mom and whatever you went through there. Government agencies and aging parents are a dreadful combination for those of us who end up navigating them 😩 Sending you a lot of love. 2026 here we come ❤️🔥🐦🔥
Thank you, Peter. Figured I’d do my best to start the new year with hope, some laughs and a side of rage. Sending you a lot of love and the best possible wishes for 2026! It will be an adventure, that much we know ❤️
The rage of perimenopausal (and menopausal women): YES. A thousand times yes. Also yes to everything here, including the bone-deep exhaustion, the sadness, the need for a disappear-and-replenish button, and the enduring hope that together, we will figure this shit out.
So funny because I just edited to add my post-menopausal besties, too! I was scrambling to get this out and can’t believe the oversight. But that’s what the edit button is for. If only we had one of those for life! I’m full of ideas, Irena. Trapdoors, tap-out buttons, sleepaway camps for our friends who have had it. Until then, we have each other and I am extremely grateful. Thank you for being here!!!! 🙏🏼❤️🔥❤️🩹
Hahahaha. I wouldn’t know, I’d have to ask YOU!! And same, we will Thelma and Louise our way through this, except we are not going off any cliffs, we are heading toward the sunset and taking all our friends. Brad Pitt can stay home! Love youuuuuuuu!!
My god, we've led parallel lives these past few years only you've written about it today so much better than I could come up with after many drafts. I'm also celebrate a February birthday and just went through a similar DMV experience as well. I'm glad you're on the other side now and ready to face 2026. Me too. Let's go! xx
Thanks so much, Deborah. I have a feeling there are a lot of us living parallel lives, especially those of us dealing with a lot of loss at once and a life with lots of demands. I used to be really hard on myself, and there are days that tendency tries to take hold (and sometimes does), but I’ve gotten so much better at being reasonable with myself. Which feels like a big deal. I hope you pull out one of your drafts and keep after it. And I thank you for being here ❤️❤️🔥
Oh Ally how you speak so well of your life, your experience and your opinions! Agree, Agree and funny I will go to DMV tomorrow and hope… for a real id. I somehow lost the week between Christmas and New Years.
I look forward to reading “Come As You Are”.
A grateful reader. Your strength is contagious. Let’s rise up together! Women if United can power this movement of Resistance!!
Thanks so much, Lynn. And don’t let me talk you into a Real ID. If you have a passport and/or aren’t going to travel internationally I don’t really understand the need. At all. But if you’re going to renew your license anyway or you need to replace it and they won’t charge you more, maybe 🤷🏻♀️
Thanks so much for being here and for all your kind words. You’re wonderful. If we have to head into this madness I’m glad to head into it with you ❤️🩹
"soulless turdskeeters" --> Excuse me while I wipe the tea off my chin. I'm also picturing a whole line of v̶o̶o̶d̶o̶o̶ ̶d̶o̶l̶l̶s̶ plush toys emerging from that descriptor. 👹 😈 👺
Hard to believe you've been renewing successfully without any issue and all this came to light when you went in person. What a pain. And yet how great that you were able to just get it all done in one visit. One foot in front of the other. All the way through, and in spite of, this horrible time in history. RAWR!! Yes, please do what's needed to take care of yourself. We need you. We need each other. Happy New Year, Ally!
I’ve decided my side hobby is coming up with new expletives. It pleases me 🤣 and I will take the laughs where I can get them! And yes! The VIN number thing was crazy, and she was so deadpan. Just did not have time for shenanigans. One foot in front of the other, holding hands when we need to. Hugs at the ready. Thank you for being here, Elizabeth, I appreciate you ❤️🔥🙏🏼🥹
Love the idea of the opt out button! That would be so amazing 🧡
Also, hell yeah to “we will rise!” We always rise, although I wish we didn’t get pushed down so much that we had to keep rising and rising…but nevertheless we persist 💪
I think that’s the very least we deserve. Where is the button and the trapdoor with the fun slide, Sonbol?! I agree of course. I long for a world where we did not have to keep rising. Where we could rest and recover and frolic and breathe. But until we get there, we rise together. Which makes it a lot easier. Thank you for being here from the bottom of my heart ♥️🐦🔥
I'm glad you got your Real ID. It's interesting that you'd have to re-register to vote. That's not something we have to do in Massachusetts. I guess they figured that we all think so highly of ourselves we'd never pretend to be anyone else😉
I agree that the power of women's righteous anger will prevail in the end. We never give up, and we never forget. Be well🧡
Yeah I guess here it’s like you’re entering a new form that overrides the old one or … something. I wasn’t going to argue with her after the VIN number debacle 🤣
Thanks so much for being here, EFS. You’re a “foxhole person” ☺️❤️🔥
DMV hint: go half hour before they close if you are just renewing (no tests during that time). It's worked for 20+ years. Love your comment about pissing off perimenopausal women. Applies to menopausal women, too. 😃.
Excellent. I shall add this to the data. I’ve been renewing online for years but I guess it was time for my eye exam, which I passed TYVM. I need readers, but I can see entire cars with no problem lol. And yes for those of us in perimenopause and I’m glad to hear the useful rage continues post-menopause, though I suspected that was the case. I based that on all the brilliant post-menopausal women in my life! Thank you for being here, Sharon ❤️🔥❤️🔥🙏🏼
Loved this. Bon courage.
Thank you, Susan. And thank you for being here ❤️🔥❤️🔥
I love the getaway idea. This should be baked in to the "reality" of Life on Earth". Your birth certificate comes with 10 free ones, and you can opt in for additional leases during times of fascism and disarray. And divorce.
Yessssss. Why is this not a thing? It feels like it should be obvious. Thanks so much for being here, Valkyrie. I appreciate you 🙏🏼❤️🔥❤️🩹
I have DMV stories I can’t think about today. Too infuriating and they relate to my dead mother who was elderly and disabled and her name not matching her birth certificate. Stop it Mary. I have to get my licensed renewed this year. I did it through the mail last time. Pretty sure I’m going to have to get a new picture since my photo on my license is 18 years old. Damn, I was wanting to look 52 forever. I never informed them I had cataract surgery in 2020 and can now see so if I pass their eye test they can remove that restriction. My state can’t force Real ID to vote and I use my passport for flying so hopefully my little town will make this year’s DMV trip easy. I better put it in my calendar to do early because I will be traveling for my big 70th.
I was shocked it was as easy as it was, Mary. Not that it was easy given…all the things. And I did the Real ID because she assured me it would be easy with voter registration, I guess we will see. I have my original birth certificate (found it in my dad’s stuff) and my passport so I think I should be okay, and it’s the first thing I’m going to verify when it comes in the mail. I’m sorry about your Mom and whatever you went through there. Government agencies and aging parents are a dreadful combination for those of us who end up navigating them 😩 Sending you a lot of love. 2026 here we come ❤️🔥🐦🔥
LFG Ally. DM me for an open invitation to a recharge getaway.
Thank you, Kate, I may take you up on that. I don’t know why there isn’t a trapdoor, there really should be! Hugs. So happy you’re here ❤️🔥🙏🏼
Love this, Ally.
Thank you, John. Wishing you a healthy, safe, creative 2026 ❤️
Hi Ally, such a brilliant essay as always! Let's hope that 2026 is a bit better than the shit show that was 2025.
Also thank you for being here and sharing your thoughts.
All the best to you and your family as always x
Thank you, Peter. Figured I’d do my best to start the new year with hope, some laughs and a side of rage. Sending you a lot of love and the best possible wishes for 2026! It will be an adventure, that much we know ❤️
Oh my god. Yes.
Thanks for being here, Jane.
The rage of perimenopausal (and menopausal women): YES. A thousand times yes. Also yes to everything here, including the bone-deep exhaustion, the sadness, the need for a disappear-and-replenish button, and the enduring hope that together, we will figure this shit out.
So funny because I just edited to add my post-menopausal besties, too! I was scrambling to get this out and can’t believe the oversight. But that’s what the edit button is for. If only we had one of those for life! I’m full of ideas, Irena. Trapdoors, tap-out buttons, sleepaway camps for our friends who have had it. Until then, we have each other and I am extremely grateful. Thank you for being here!!!! 🙏🏼❤️🔥❤️🩹
How does it feel to be the actual best?
Careening into 2026 with your friendship in my hot sweaty grip is about all I got going for me and it’s more than enough. xo
Hahahaha. I wouldn’t know, I’d have to ask YOU!! And same, we will Thelma and Louise our way through this, except we are not going off any cliffs, we are heading toward the sunset and taking all our friends. Brad Pitt can stay home! Love youuuuuuuu!!
My god, we've led parallel lives these past few years only you've written about it today so much better than I could come up with after many drafts. I'm also celebrate a February birthday and just went through a similar DMV experience as well. I'm glad you're on the other side now and ready to face 2026. Me too. Let's go! xx
Thanks so much, Deborah. I have a feeling there are a lot of us living parallel lives, especially those of us dealing with a lot of loss at once and a life with lots of demands. I used to be really hard on myself, and there are days that tendency tries to take hold (and sometimes does), but I’ve gotten so much better at being reasonable with myself. Which feels like a big deal. I hope you pull out one of your drafts and keep after it. And I thank you for being here ❤️❤️🔥
Oh Ally how you speak so well of your life, your experience and your opinions! Agree, Agree and funny I will go to DMV tomorrow and hope… for a real id. I somehow lost the week between Christmas and New Years.
I look forward to reading “Come As You Are”.
A grateful reader. Your strength is contagious. Let’s rise up together! Women if United can power this movement of Resistance!!
It’s our time!
Thanks so much, Lynn. And don’t let me talk you into a Real ID. If you have a passport and/or aren’t going to travel internationally I don’t really understand the need. At all. But if you’re going to renew your license anyway or you need to replace it and they won’t charge you more, maybe 🤷🏻♀️
Thanks so much for being here and for all your kind words. You’re wonderful. If we have to head into this madness I’m glad to head into it with you ❤️🩹
Me too!! Keep your great spirit
"soulless turdskeeters" --> Excuse me while I wipe the tea off my chin. I'm also picturing a whole line of v̶o̶o̶d̶o̶o̶ ̶d̶o̶l̶l̶s̶ plush toys emerging from that descriptor. 👹 😈 👺
Hard to believe you've been renewing successfully without any issue and all this came to light when you went in person. What a pain. And yet how great that you were able to just get it all done in one visit. One foot in front of the other. All the way through, and in spite of, this horrible time in history. RAWR!! Yes, please do what's needed to take care of yourself. We need you. We need each other. Happy New Year, Ally!
I’ve decided my side hobby is coming up with new expletives. It pleases me 🤣 and I will take the laughs where I can get them! And yes! The VIN number thing was crazy, and she was so deadpan. Just did not have time for shenanigans. One foot in front of the other, holding hands when we need to. Hugs at the ready. Thank you for being here, Elizabeth, I appreciate you ❤️🔥🙏🏼🥹
Love the idea of the opt out button! That would be so amazing 🧡
Also, hell yeah to “we will rise!” We always rise, although I wish we didn’t get pushed down so much that we had to keep rising and rising…but nevertheless we persist 💪
I think that’s the very least we deserve. Where is the button and the trapdoor with the fun slide, Sonbol?! I agree of course. I long for a world where we did not have to keep rising. Where we could rest and recover and frolic and breathe. But until we get there, we rise together. Which makes it a lot easier. Thank you for being here from the bottom of my heart ♥️🐦🔥
I'm glad you got your Real ID. It's interesting that you'd have to re-register to vote. That's not something we have to do in Massachusetts. I guess they figured that we all think so highly of ourselves we'd never pretend to be anyone else😉
I agree that the power of women's righteous anger will prevail in the end. We never give up, and we never forget. Be well🧡
Yeah I guess here it’s like you’re entering a new form that overrides the old one or … something. I wasn’t going to argue with her after the VIN number debacle 🤣
Thanks so much for being here, EFS. You’re a “foxhole person” ☺️❤️🔥
DMV hint: go half hour before they close if you are just renewing (no tests during that time). It's worked for 20+ years. Love your comment about pissing off perimenopausal women. Applies to menopausal women, too. 😃.
Excellent. I shall add this to the data. I’ve been renewing online for years but I guess it was time for my eye exam, which I passed TYVM. I need readers, but I can see entire cars with no problem lol. And yes for those of us in perimenopause and I’m glad to hear the useful rage continues post-menopause, though I suspected that was the case. I based that on all the brilliant post-menopausal women in my life! Thank you for being here, Sharon ❤️🔥❤️🔥🙏🏼