You're a master braider, Ally. Lillith, Snow White, wife rape, not being believed, himpathy... it's all so interwoven, all so egregious. My soul also cannot begin to conceive of drugging someone and debasing them. I can't even look at the weeping willow in my backyard without seeing the god light pouring through it. How exactly does one untether oneself from the fabric of reality? How does someone sever their connection with the divine in such a way as to defend or act upon these atrocities? What a goddamn waste of existence. (Also, I cried when your mother hugged you. More so when she didn't believe you, but there were real tears on both ends of that story. I'm so sorry, friend.) Thank you for shining so bright, even when it burns.
Thank you for these beautiful comments, Kendall, and for your tears on all sides. I feel we are made of the same stuff. I grapple with the same questions and inability to understand the how of treating anyone that way. I will never understand but I’m glad of it, and grateful for you, friend ❤️🩹
And now I’m crying from both of these comments. Ally, this piece brilliantly says things my heart wonders about, and Kendall, you say that and more so perfectly. Thank you both and you give me much needed hope.
I think there are so many of us astounded and gutted by the lack of compassion and basic human decency, Jen. You're not alone, and as much as all of this hurts and is unfathomable, I am so grateful those of us who are feeling it deeply are finding one another <3
Really? How odd! I wonder if it would help if you logged out and logged back in (if that’s easy and you want to see if that does it), I just had someone restack it a few minutes ago…
This is breathtaking, thorough, biting and emotionally vulnerable. My God. Thank you for your hard work, and your open heart. My heart is breaking right now.
Thank you so much, Laury. I keep thinking my heart can’t break any further and then it does. Seems like we’re all experiencing some version of that. Maybe that’s what it will finally take, all of us raging forward with our hearts broken open, refusing to be quiet, calling things what they are, and slowly taking the power away from them as we do. Thanks so much for being here, you’re such a kindhearted soul ❤️🩹❤️🩹
Thank you💙 "...raging forward with your heart broken open, refusing to be quiet, calling things what they are." Broken-hearted courage. We appreciate you, Ally.
Plough the bare Earth and build a park. Name it after the girl. Yes, while she yet lives.
Testify as a human community, "This evil was impermissible, so we caused that it should no longer remain among us. Here, in its place, we establish peace."
No school must remain standing if it will not stand for what's inarguably right.
It is outrageous that her mother was letting the school know her daughter was being harassed by this boy and they refused to put an end to it. Schools have become as careful as every other institution. There’s so much concern about litigation. It’s insanity. I’ve had mild experiences with this as a mom where things have happened at school and I’ve reached out and felt dissatisfied. There’s a lot of confidentiality which I understand when minors are involved, so sometimes you register a complaint and are told “we will reach out to the other child’s family” — especially if it isn’t the first complaint — and unless you want to escalate that’s as far as it goes. You won’t find out if the other child was suspended or what happened unless your child finds out through the grapevine, or notices the kid was absent for a few days. If you escalate then the other kid will know your kid told their mom, and that can make things worse. Even then, is suspension the best repercussion?
And when there’s ongoing abuse, harassment, bullying? I have not been in that situation but I know so many parents who have, and most of them will tell you the level of support they received was inadequate. I think the public school system as a whole and all the teachers and admin deserve effing awards, but I also think we need a LOT more funding to go toward mental health support for these kids, and for the staff, too! School shootings and active shooter drills and funding cuts and just all of it, in a world with increasing stress for everyone. Our teachers are heroic. But yeah, definitely we need more mental health services and interventions and protocols in place when a child is being harassed. Instant and immediate consequences that aren’t “tell a trusted adult” and then nothing happens.
Anyway. I have feelings about this, too. Thanks for your comments and for being here❤️🩹
I always get myself settled in when I read your work, Ally. I know I will be taken on a ride of emotions. I know I will relate. This one started with "Which way do the motherless daughters run?" and never let up. I can't add more to your glorious work (and why would I?) But, I see you. I stand with you. I cry with you. And, I rage with you.
Quite frankly I think we need to recreate the Amazon Women warriors, and start going for the throat, as well as that appendage that hangs between their legs!
They run to those who help and comfort them. There are those of us who have "chosen" family because the "family" we were given at birth only betrays us.
No doubt I wouldn’t have made it without my chosen family, Katharina ❤️🩹🙏🏼Was also posing the larger question about how any of us can be safe when “not all men” but far too many — and the women who love them/are dealing with their own internalized misogyny — are holding up a system that harms us. Thanks for being here.
I completely understand your larger question, but chose to answer the one most necessary for those who might be hurting now. I find myself at my 'sort-of' advanced age wondering how come we are still fighting this fight? How can we still be voting for these people with our political votes, our dollars and most of all, our acquiescence to the way society wants women to behave. I watch it over and over again with my students who feel like they don't have as much worth if they don't have a boyfriend. The parents who still think their children have to get married. This refusal to buck the system that most young women think is the way to live. I try so hard not to despair - and you and others give me hope that perhaps your generation and the one that is coming up together with me and the others that are still fighting this fight will change something real in our society. I too belong to the club of women betrayed by their own mothers. I broke that cycle. Now I watch in horror how the manosphere feels that they have been "wronged" by women who just want to be able to say no to someone who creeps them out. *deep sigh* We keep fighting and trying to change things until hopefully someday this fight isn't necessary.
It’s so devastating and unfathomable to watch women vote for people who make it clear they have zero respect or care for women — and in fact, harbor great contempt for them — even though I understand internalized misogyny. I just cannot believe anyone needs further convincing at this point. And then when there’s an opportunity to vote for real change, the people clamoring for it the most loudly don’t seem to come through. It’s demoralizing. (Thinking about the governor’s race in CA right now).
And the manosphere and “male loneliness epidemic” smh. There’s a male violence epidemic. There’s a “put women back in the kitchen” epidemic. It is exhausting to keep fighting the same battles, and I know everyone who’s been fighting feels the same way. I also try not to sink into despair. I do my best to regroup and recharge when I feel depleted or overwhelmed. Just some days are harder than others and that’s when community is everything and that chosen family we were talking about is where I head. Thank you so much for being here. Really appreciate you❤️🩹🙏🏼
I learned so much I wasn't aware of. Sadly there are so many young girls and women who can or could have told these stories. I'm thinking of one in particular who died of suicide after being bullied after her rape and assault. She didn't get to see justice and he is about to be released from jail again. The justice system didn't help her and her family was asked to stop speaking out and seeking justice for their dead daughter. There are horror stories everywhere and so many more that are never revealed.
This is the part that hurts so much. I really know how shattered you feel as a kid after an experience like that, and how horrible it is not to be believed, or to be blamed for “making bad decisions” even though they’re not.
In my case I should have been safe, I was with an adult. But even if I hadn’t been. Even when girls are out with people their own age. Even when women are out with their peers. Drinking too much or wearing a short skirt or flirting. Really? Teenage boys and young men and older men alike drink too much and flirt and wear things they hope are appealing. We don’t crucify them for it or decide because of that we can do whatever the fuck we want and beat the crap out of them and not take no for an answer and rape them because obviously they meant yes.
It’s so barbaric and insane. We don’t cast aspersions on their character. We don’t call them whores and say they were asking for it. It’s all patriarchal bs excuses where they justify being absolute beasts because we weren’t home churning butter. That isn’t it. That’s just an excuse to punish us for thinking we were allowed to have a little freedom, or because maybe we were enjoying the tiny bit of power we wield if they don’t turn it against us.
My heart hurts for the family of that girl. I barely made it through that experience. I cannot believe they’ve been “asked to stop speaking out and seeking justice on her behalf”…wtf??? Why? Is there anywhere to send flowers or a letter to her mom or anything?
Sending you a ton of love, Mary. Thanks so much for being here.
My god. Living as a woman in this time is excruciating. Honesty is vital but so difficult and it costs so much. Thank you, Ally, for showing us how it is done.
It really is so painful right now. I look at my sixteen-year-old and want to rage and wail and scream at the gods and howl at the moon and breathe fire on any man who would even think about hurting her. That part is the hardest. But ultimately it’s also the reason I will never give up and I will never shut up. We all deserve so much better than this and we should have it and we can have it, but I guess we are going to have to keep fighting like hell. And somehow also doing all the other things. I thank you so much for being here, Charrise ❤️🩹❤️🔥❤️🔥
My daughter is 42 and my son is 39. I am grappling with the right way to approach programming already in place. Different problem but still necessary to tackle with all the voice I have in me because I have two male grandchildren. My daughter has not married and if she does I want her to make the right choice, having been properly informed. Jesus it’s a lot. We must create something better. I stand with you and will also not stop.
Masterful, Ally. Worth the 9 gazillion edits to get to this. It's too much, too much heartbreak, and still, every woman I know is trying to write through all of this without just screaming for rolling heads and revenge, and still that's not enough. It will never be enough. I don't think it will ever be enough.
I wonder about that, too. What it will take. If anything will be enough. What we will need to do or say, or if we’ll just have to act, finally. Disengage. Quiet quit. Make a new plan, Stan. Get off the bus, Gus. And get ourselves free.
Ally, I am still reeling from and processing your last piece, only to have my heart ripped open again here. The immensity of the layers that you unfold sting more with every truth peeled back. The fact that so many of us have experienced such violations of our bodies, and to have felt the continued betrayals over time through disbelief/doubt/deflection/blame, is exhausting and heart-wrenching. I hated that I had some kind of personal experience (myself or someone very close to me) in which I could relate to so many of your beautifully horrific examples. Your voice is valuable. Precious. The kind that will remove the -less from the motherless 💗🌺.
When I was growing up and these things were happening I thought it must be living in NYC as a latchkey kid — but when I started writing about it, my heart broke, because it’s all of us, everywhere. It’s painful these stories resonate with so many of us, but I’m also so grateful to be in these conversations and to have this community. No one should be dealing with all this rage and despair alone. We shall not let the bastards grind us down. Thank you for being here, Sabrina. Your words went right to my heart and came out the corners of my eyes a little 🥹❤️🩹🙏🏼
It is not in big cities and with latchkey kids alone Ally. I spend a year of my adolescence living in a small community in Pakistan, and shared space with rural families, and it is there too. Silently hovering. Like a horror film that replays over and over in the darkness, in the light, in secret corners and in widespread awareness, all under the umbrella of whispers and secrets and silence. It is everywhere, in different shapes, the same core. Years ago, this community of “me too” annoyed me, feeling like another trend people wanted to jump on (I admit that with embarrassment). But as more and more stories come to light, each more horrific than the last, I feel a deep sense of sisterhood with each voice. A hand held across borders that says, “yes, me too, I’m here, with you, you are not alone”. Which is a heartbreaking foundation to build from, to grow from. But there it is. ❤️🩹
I guess this is the second wave, but somehow this one feels feral. I have the sense we will not shut up, we will not go away, this is not a trend or a hashtag, and we will not be satisfied with one disgusting film producer/predator/rapist behind bars. Or one predator/pedophile woman. There are just millions of us, enraged, loud, together. I think we will prevail.
Damn, Ally. So painful and so good. We are all creating history and the work you and others are doing is invaluable. Especially during this time when we have all seemingly lost our collective minds.
Thank you for the hard work you are doing to illuminate this time period. It’s such a shameful record; we can only hope that we will all face our shadows, eventually feel collective shame, and actually change our systems.
I don't know how you put this all together without having a rage stroke, but I salute you. I've been putting off watching the Lilith Fair doc because I thought it might be too shook by the fact that we've only gone backwards. Your post made me think I should watch it for all the Liliths out there. You are such a warrior, Ally. xo
I think you will probably be very moved, in a good way. I mean I am ridiculous and I cry easily so I’m not the right bar for the tears meter, but it’s just so impressive and the way she was discouraged and dissuaded and then to have this outrageous success. It was amazing and emotional to watch and also like, YEAH. See??? wtf. Plus every single one of them is so talented and generous and funny and smart. And you’ll see all this BTS stuff and yeah. I loved it. That’s the world we all deserve.
I watched the documentary. I had no idea that Sarah M was such a badass. So many glorious goddesses just doing what women do…taking care of shit. I loved it ❤️
I’ve a nose for news. In my younger years I was a radio /news/talk show host outside nyc. I read your story with fine tuned ear. Google is always ready & willing. Listened to your 2011 TED Santa Monica talk . As a born and raised BHills Ca lady I relate to your words . Video and written. Yoga isn’t my forte. Age 75. Tennis is my outlet and my Black English Lab Alvin. I write occasionally on Substack. Abused as a teenager. Your understanding of the monsters is pure . I fought mine. You’re quite a woman ,mother and teacher. I escaped LALA . Revisit when I write. Aloha
It’s so good to meet you, Jennifer. And it sounds like we’ve been traversing adjacent stomping grounds on both coasts at different times 🍎🌴Can’t believe you went and found that TEDx talk, you aren’t kidding about the fine-tuned ear! Thank you for your very kind words. I am so sorry you also have these stories, but I am very thankful you’re here❤️🩹❤️🩹
You're a master braider, Ally. Lillith, Snow White, wife rape, not being believed, himpathy... it's all so interwoven, all so egregious. My soul also cannot begin to conceive of drugging someone and debasing them. I can't even look at the weeping willow in my backyard without seeing the god light pouring through it. How exactly does one untether oneself from the fabric of reality? How does someone sever their connection with the divine in such a way as to defend or act upon these atrocities? What a goddamn waste of existence. (Also, I cried when your mother hugged you. More so when she didn't believe you, but there were real tears on both ends of that story. I'm so sorry, friend.) Thank you for shining so bright, even when it burns.
Thank you for these beautiful comments, Kendall, and for your tears on all sides. I feel we are made of the same stuff. I grapple with the same questions and inability to understand the how of treating anyone that way. I will never understand but I’m glad of it, and grateful for you, friend ❤️🩹
And now I’m crying from both of these comments. Ally, this piece brilliantly says things my heart wonders about, and Kendall, you say that and more so perfectly. Thank you both and you give me much needed hope.
I think there are so many of us astounded and gutted by the lack of compassion and basic human decency, Jen. You're not alone, and as much as all of this hurts and is unfathomable, I am so grateful those of us who are feeling it deeply are finding one another <3
Just to warn you, Substack isn't letting ppl restack this post. I tried multiple times and kept getting an error message. 😡😡😡
Really? How odd! I wonder if it would help if you logged out and logged back in (if that’s easy and you want to see if that does it), I just had someone restack it a few minutes ago…
This is breathtaking, thorough, biting and emotionally vulnerable. My God. Thank you for your hard work, and your open heart. My heart is breaking right now.
Thank you so much, Laury. I keep thinking my heart can’t break any further and then it does. Seems like we’re all experiencing some version of that. Maybe that’s what it will finally take, all of us raging forward with our hearts broken open, refusing to be quiet, calling things what they are, and slowly taking the power away from them as we do. Thanks so much for being here, you’re such a kindhearted soul ❤️🩹❤️🩹
Thank you💙 "...raging forward with your heart broken open, refusing to be quiet, calling things what they are." Broken-hearted courage. We appreciate you, Ally.
"The school has not stepped in."
Fine. Raze it to the bare dirt.
Plough the bare Earth and build a park. Name it after the girl. Yes, while she yet lives.
Testify as a human community, "This evil was impermissible, so we caused that it should no longer remain among us. Here, in its place, we establish peace."
No school must remain standing if it will not stand for what's inarguably right.
It is outrageous that her mother was letting the school know her daughter was being harassed by this boy and they refused to put an end to it. Schools have become as careful as every other institution. There’s so much concern about litigation. It’s insanity. I’ve had mild experiences with this as a mom where things have happened at school and I’ve reached out and felt dissatisfied. There’s a lot of confidentiality which I understand when minors are involved, so sometimes you register a complaint and are told “we will reach out to the other child’s family” — especially if it isn’t the first complaint — and unless you want to escalate that’s as far as it goes. You won’t find out if the other child was suspended or what happened unless your child finds out through the grapevine, or notices the kid was absent for a few days. If you escalate then the other kid will know your kid told their mom, and that can make things worse. Even then, is suspension the best repercussion?
And when there’s ongoing abuse, harassment, bullying? I have not been in that situation but I know so many parents who have, and most of them will tell you the level of support they received was inadequate. I think the public school system as a whole and all the teachers and admin deserve effing awards, but I also think we need a LOT more funding to go toward mental health support for these kids, and for the staff, too! School shootings and active shooter drills and funding cuts and just all of it, in a world with increasing stress for everyone. Our teachers are heroic. But yeah, definitely we need more mental health services and interventions and protocols in place when a child is being harassed. Instant and immediate consequences that aren’t “tell a trusted adult” and then nothing happens.
Anyway. I have feelings about this, too. Thanks for your comments and for being here❤️🩹
I always get myself settled in when I read your work, Ally. I know I will be taken on a ride of emotions. I know I will relate. This one started with "Which way do the motherless daughters run?" and never let up. I can't add more to your glorious work (and why would I?) But, I see you. I stand with you. I cry with you. And, I rage with you.
Thank you so much, Michele. Means the world from you. I appreciate this very much 🥹❤️🩹🙏🏼
Quite frankly I think we need to recreate the Amazon Women warriors, and start going for the throat, as well as that appendage that hangs between their legs!
Have to admit that has crossed my mind more than once the last few weeks, Alexis❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥
We need to BECOME the Amazon warriors. There's no Prince Charming coming to rescue us; he's just a different abuser.
I think we are all in agreement, Carol! Let the Amazon Warrior Training begin!
I am absolutely in awe of your ability as a writer, and also what you have overcome to be such a voice, such a beacon 💙
And sick to my stomach too at the layers of depravity which are being uncovered week by week in our so-called civilised world
Sending you enormous love 💙
Thank you so much, Janey. I felt that right in my heart. It means the world to me that you’re here ♥️❤️🩹🙏🏼
They run to those who help and comfort them. There are those of us who have "chosen" family because the "family" we were given at birth only betrays us.
No doubt I wouldn’t have made it without my chosen family, Katharina ❤️🩹🙏🏼Was also posing the larger question about how any of us can be safe when “not all men” but far too many — and the women who love them/are dealing with their own internalized misogyny — are holding up a system that harms us. Thanks for being here.
I completely understand your larger question, but chose to answer the one most necessary for those who might be hurting now. I find myself at my 'sort-of' advanced age wondering how come we are still fighting this fight? How can we still be voting for these people with our political votes, our dollars and most of all, our acquiescence to the way society wants women to behave. I watch it over and over again with my students who feel like they don't have as much worth if they don't have a boyfriend. The parents who still think their children have to get married. This refusal to buck the system that most young women think is the way to live. I try so hard not to despair - and you and others give me hope that perhaps your generation and the one that is coming up together with me and the others that are still fighting this fight will change something real in our society. I too belong to the club of women betrayed by their own mothers. I broke that cycle. Now I watch in horror how the manosphere feels that they have been "wronged" by women who just want to be able to say no to someone who creeps them out. *deep sigh* We keep fighting and trying to change things until hopefully someday this fight isn't necessary.
It’s so devastating and unfathomable to watch women vote for people who make it clear they have zero respect or care for women — and in fact, harbor great contempt for them — even though I understand internalized misogyny. I just cannot believe anyone needs further convincing at this point. And then when there’s an opportunity to vote for real change, the people clamoring for it the most loudly don’t seem to come through. It’s demoralizing. (Thinking about the governor’s race in CA right now).
And the manosphere and “male loneliness epidemic” smh. There’s a male violence epidemic. There’s a “put women back in the kitchen” epidemic. It is exhausting to keep fighting the same battles, and I know everyone who’s been fighting feels the same way. I also try not to sink into despair. I do my best to regroup and recharge when I feel depleted or overwhelmed. Just some days are harder than others and that’s when community is everything and that chosen family we were talking about is where I head. Thank you so much for being here. Really appreciate you❤️🩹🙏🏼
It does my heart good to also be with others who are keeping this matter on the forefront! Thank you for a wonderful article!
I learned so much I wasn't aware of. Sadly there are so many young girls and women who can or could have told these stories. I'm thinking of one in particular who died of suicide after being bullied after her rape and assault. She didn't get to see justice and he is about to be released from jail again. The justice system didn't help her and her family was asked to stop speaking out and seeking justice for their dead daughter. There are horror stories everywhere and so many more that are never revealed.
This is the part that hurts so much. I really know how shattered you feel as a kid after an experience like that, and how horrible it is not to be believed, or to be blamed for “making bad decisions” even though they’re not.
In my case I should have been safe, I was with an adult. But even if I hadn’t been. Even when girls are out with people their own age. Even when women are out with their peers. Drinking too much or wearing a short skirt or flirting. Really? Teenage boys and young men and older men alike drink too much and flirt and wear things they hope are appealing. We don’t crucify them for it or decide because of that we can do whatever the fuck we want and beat the crap out of them and not take no for an answer and rape them because obviously they meant yes.
It’s so barbaric and insane. We don’t cast aspersions on their character. We don’t call them whores and say they were asking for it. It’s all patriarchal bs excuses where they justify being absolute beasts because we weren’t home churning butter. That isn’t it. That’s just an excuse to punish us for thinking we were allowed to have a little freedom, or because maybe we were enjoying the tiny bit of power we wield if they don’t turn it against us.
My heart hurts for the family of that girl. I barely made it through that experience. I cannot believe they’ve been “asked to stop speaking out and seeking justice on her behalf”…wtf??? Why? Is there anywhere to send flowers or a letter to her mom or anything?
Sending you a ton of love, Mary. Thanks so much for being here.
My god. Living as a woman in this time is excruciating. Honesty is vital but so difficult and it costs so much. Thank you, Ally, for showing us how it is done.
It really is so painful right now. I look at my sixteen-year-old and want to rage and wail and scream at the gods and howl at the moon and breathe fire on any man who would even think about hurting her. That part is the hardest. But ultimately it’s also the reason I will never give up and I will never shut up. We all deserve so much better than this and we should have it and we can have it, but I guess we are going to have to keep fighting like hell. And somehow also doing all the other things. I thank you so much for being here, Charrise ❤️🩹❤️🔥❤️🔥
My daughter is 42 and my son is 39. I am grappling with the right way to approach programming already in place. Different problem but still necessary to tackle with all the voice I have in me because I have two male grandchildren. My daughter has not married and if she does I want her to make the right choice, having been properly informed. Jesus it’s a lot. We must create something better. I stand with you and will also not stop.
Just read the first few paragraphs and am intrigued! This should be part of feminist studies courses.
Thank you, Karen. I had to stop myself from going back to the Greek gods! Though I’ve gone there before. Thanks for being here❤️🩹
Masterful, Ally. Worth the 9 gazillion edits to get to this. It's too much, too much heartbreak, and still, every woman I know is trying to write through all of this without just screaming for rolling heads and revenge, and still that's not enough. It will never be enough. I don't think it will ever be enough.
I wonder about that, too. What it will take. If anything will be enough. What we will need to do or say, or if we’ll just have to act, finally. Disengage. Quiet quit. Make a new plan, Stan. Get off the bus, Gus. And get ourselves free.
Ally, I am still reeling from and processing your last piece, only to have my heart ripped open again here. The immensity of the layers that you unfold sting more with every truth peeled back. The fact that so many of us have experienced such violations of our bodies, and to have felt the continued betrayals over time through disbelief/doubt/deflection/blame, is exhausting and heart-wrenching. I hated that I had some kind of personal experience (myself or someone very close to me) in which I could relate to so many of your beautifully horrific examples. Your voice is valuable. Precious. The kind that will remove the -less from the motherless 💗🌺.
When I was growing up and these things were happening I thought it must be living in NYC as a latchkey kid — but when I started writing about it, my heart broke, because it’s all of us, everywhere. It’s painful these stories resonate with so many of us, but I’m also so grateful to be in these conversations and to have this community. No one should be dealing with all this rage and despair alone. We shall not let the bastards grind us down. Thank you for being here, Sabrina. Your words went right to my heart and came out the corners of my eyes a little 🥹❤️🩹🙏🏼
It is not in big cities and with latchkey kids alone Ally. I spend a year of my adolescence living in a small community in Pakistan, and shared space with rural families, and it is there too. Silently hovering. Like a horror film that replays over and over in the darkness, in the light, in secret corners and in widespread awareness, all under the umbrella of whispers and secrets and silence. It is everywhere, in different shapes, the same core. Years ago, this community of “me too” annoyed me, feeling like another trend people wanted to jump on (I admit that with embarrassment). But as more and more stories come to light, each more horrific than the last, I feel a deep sense of sisterhood with each voice. A hand held across borders that says, “yes, me too, I’m here, with you, you are not alone”. Which is a heartbreaking foundation to build from, to grow from. But there it is. ❤️🩹
I guess this is the second wave, but somehow this one feels feral. I have the sense we will not shut up, we will not go away, this is not a trend or a hashtag, and we will not be satisfied with one disgusting film producer/predator/rapist behind bars. Or one predator/pedophile woman. There are just millions of us, enraged, loud, together. I think we will prevail.
Yes - feral. Primal. Guttural and cellular.
Thank god 💗
Damn, Ally. So painful and so good. We are all creating history and the work you and others are doing is invaluable. Especially during this time when we have all seemingly lost our collective minds.
Thank you for the hard work you are doing to illuminate this time period. It’s such a shameful record; we can only hope that we will all face our shadows, eventually feel collective shame, and actually change our systems.
Peace to you.
Thanks for being here, Robert, I appreciate you.
I don't know how you put this all together without having a rage stroke, but I salute you. I've been putting off watching the Lilith Fair doc because I thought it might be too shook by the fact that we've only gone backwards. Your post made me think I should watch it for all the Liliths out there. You are such a warrior, Ally. xo
I think you will probably be very moved, in a good way. I mean I am ridiculous and I cry easily so I’m not the right bar for the tears meter, but it’s just so impressive and the way she was discouraged and dissuaded and then to have this outrageous success. It was amazing and emotional to watch and also like, YEAH. See??? wtf. Plus every single one of them is so talented and generous and funny and smart. And you’ll see all this BTS stuff and yeah. I loved it. That’s the world we all deserve.
I watched the documentary. I had no idea that Sarah M was such a badass. So many glorious goddesses just doing what women do…taking care of shit. I loved it ❤️
Right? Freaking fantastic. I felt pretty sure you would love it!
Oof. This was so beautifully written but the content is so hard to stomach. The way you’ve braided it is incredible
Thank you so much, Jessy. And thanks for being here❤️🩹
I’ve a nose for news. In my younger years I was a radio /news/talk show host outside nyc. I read your story with fine tuned ear. Google is always ready & willing. Listened to your 2011 TED Santa Monica talk . As a born and raised BHills Ca lady I relate to your words . Video and written. Yoga isn’t my forte. Age 75. Tennis is my outlet and my Black English Lab Alvin. I write occasionally on Substack. Abused as a teenager. Your understanding of the monsters is pure . I fought mine. You’re quite a woman ,mother and teacher. I escaped LALA . Revisit when I write. Aloha
It’s so good to meet you, Jennifer. And it sounds like we’ve been traversing adjacent stomping grounds on both coasts at different times 🍎🌴Can’t believe you went and found that TEDx talk, you aren’t kidding about the fine-tuned ear! Thank you for your very kind words. I am so sorry you also have these stories, but I am very thankful you’re here❤️🩹❤️🩹