It’s been a minute since I did a podcast without a guest, but this week’s episode is me, talking to you, about a thing we can all agree is never a good idea — namely, jumping to conclusions. I am someone who has always taken my time figuring out what to make of people, situations, ideas, and even my own thoughts once in a while.
Some of that might be my nature, some of it is surely nurture. I grew up in an environment where it made sense to pay attention to the clues, to test the waters, to look for any change in the weather, in an effort to keep the peace, and keep myself safe. Maybe you relate, and understand I don’t mean the literal weather. Old habits die hard.
However, sometimes people make it exceedingly easy to figure out whether you want to ride the ride. They might say something so demeaning about women and girls, you no longer have to wonder about what kind of person they are, or what kind of values they hold. If a man said he grabs women by the pussy — you would know without any doubt, that man has no respect for women at all, and would not be a man you would want to encounter alone.
You would not trust him with your daughters, or anyone’s daughters. Certainly not a country-full of daughters. That is not a man who is going to be thinking about women as equal, full-bodied human beings who deserve dignity and respect and the same rights as boys and men. It’s clear as day.
If a man said assault victims should “just take some responsibility for themselves” to avoid being attacked and, “act like an adult for fucks sake” and stay away from alcohol so they don’t end up in “a compromising situation” you would also know this is not a safe man, and not a man who respects women or understands the world we’re living in. You wouldn’t need to spend more time deciding if this was the man to represent your interests as a candidate, unless you didn’t care about the interests of girls and women. He’s spelling it out for you across the sky.
The Maya Angelou quote comes to mind, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” Or to give it a timely spin, “When someone shows you they’re a predatory-abusive-rapey-misogynistic-narcissist, believe them the first time.”
There is a human desire to twist ourselves in knots when we don’t want a thing to be true, or we want something so much, we are willing to convince ourselves what we’re seeing or hearing is not really that bad. When the “grab ‘em by the pussy” tapes came out, people who wanted to vote for the president said, “It’s just locker room talk.” But that is predator-talk. That is malignant narcissist-talk. That is misogynistic talk. That is the talk of a man who believes the rules do not apply to him.
Progressives who stuck with Platner, overlooking one scandal after another, saying “Conservatives don’t care if their candidates are predators, so Progressives shouldn’t, either,” and, “Way to go with your purity tests, hope you’re happy when Susan Collins wins” … seem to have forgotten the foundation of the Progressive Party, which is all people deserve to be treated with dignity. If you are going to throw girls and women outside the circle of care instantly because you want to “win” — you will be winning more of what we already have. No thanks.
Here’s another question on my mind this week — how many times can you lie to people before they stop believing you at all? There’s “flooding the zone” with constant mayhem which exhausts people, but there’s also the never-ending river of gaslighting. I can see how exhausting people might work in their favor, but the constant lies have created a scenario where they have no credibility with anyone who is sane. I cannot see how that’s a good thing. That’s where we are now. Maybe that’s the downside to “alternate facts.”
That’s why people were clamoring for “proof of life” from the office of Mitch McConnell, and why those requests reached a crescendo over the weekend. Even when they put out a picture of Mitch with his wife on Sunday, people wondered if it was AI generated, or a recirculated picture that was released in 2023. Hey tech bro billionaires, y’all are the ones who just love your environment-destroying AI, so enjoy the chaos. Apparently the photo is real, and as long as Mitch keeps voting against the SAVE Act, he is not my top concern.
Lindsey Graham dying Saturday night of a “brief and sudden illness” — which seems to be the result of aortic rupture/cardiac arrest — was certainly unexpected, especially while everyone was looking at Mitch McConnell. His younger sister’s appointment by the governor to finish out his term is not so strange. Spouses take over in these cases frequently, and Lindsey Graham was not married.
I don’t have anything else I’m going to say about Graham right now, except I believe he knew what was going to happen in 2016, he knew without a doubt he’d been right after January 6th, 2021, and he could not find the moral fortitude to do what was necessary for the country. He will go down in history as one of this president’s great enablers, and that is a real shame for him and horrendous for us.
The two stories that broke my heart last week were the ones that left two families shattered. ICE agents shot a husband and father-of-three, Lorenzo Salgado Araujo, an unarmed business-owner on his way to work. Of course they said he “weaponized his car and they shot him in self-defense” (script lifted from the Kristi Noem presser about the Renee Good murder), and of course they were not wearing their body-cams. They tried to blame the Dems. The medical examiner ruled Lorenzo Salgado Araujo’s death a homicide.
Lastly, the investigation into the death of Nolan Xavier Wells in Mississippi is ongoing. I will go ahead and warn you, I broke down fully talking about this because I am a mom with a son the same age, and the thought of what Nolan’s family is going through as they try to get answers about a story that makes no sense is so painful. I talked about the conversations all parents of white children need to be having with their kids. The thought of whatever Nolan went through at the end is hard to bear, and once again, there is no such thing as other people’s children. It’s why I saved this story for the end.
I genuinely hope we do a better job of taking care of each other soon, friends. Life does not have to feel this way. We could be loving each other, and staring at the stars.
