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Your mom's need reminds me of the first post of yours I read and that touched me so much I felt the need to respond (about Alice Munro and fucked up complicity). What a mess to sort through, but I'm so glad you're here to do it.

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I try to remind myself that women couldn't have their own credit cards or loans until 1974. My dad and mom split up in 1975. I think in my mother's mind, the best thing she could do for us was find a new husband. Nonetheless, she was a complicated person and I'm not sure she was well-equipped to have a daughter. It still amazes me that we were able to get as much healing done as we were in the last three weeks of her life. And I find it ironic that we started communicating clearly after she lost the ability to speak. She was not easy lol.

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can't wait to read your memoir. xo

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Thank you, Helia.

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