Dear Ally, I just read this older post and it touched me deeply. Your title tag, 'what we hold onto and what we release is everything.' I will reread it often, you embody a rare form of loving, what I think David below described well as 'bodhisattva-esque'. I am smiling with gentleness at your way of life and it deepens my belief we can be goodness. Thank you.
Thank you so much, Leslie. It was an intense few years. I’m actually headed to NY in about a week to bury my mother’s urn. I’ve already scattered some of her ashes in places I think she would have loved, but my stepdad wants to bury the rest. He’s my last living parent and I have POA once again, I have to laugh. And my son is heading to college Thursday, I’m heading there for move-in weekend. I guess my point is there’s so much loss at this time in life and I’m finding it’s a lot easier to accept that with love, patience, compassion and a sense of humor (sometimes gallows lol) than it is to fight. And it’s all “grist for the mill” one of my mother’s favorite expressions. Thanks so much for your kind comments. So appreciated ❤️
Thank you for this incredibly balanced, bodhisattva-esque point-of-view.
I was so angry with my parents, while I lived with them, and for several decades thereafter.
They both left this world in a hurry, eight years ago. Three years after that, my child, their grandson, who will only know them through me (although he is rather psychic!) was born. Ah, yes, wow, I soon began to understand them a little better. Only lately have I begun to cease fighting with them in my head.
I love what you wrote about being gentle, letting go, forgiving. Those things are coming to me late in my story but, apparently, not too late!
I really understand what it’s like to be fighting with people in your head and how freeing it is when you don’t have to do that anymore. I feel my compassion for my mother grows all the time. My dad, not so much but I do hope he’s smacking his lips drinking coffee and having an Apple fritter somewhere out there :) Thanks again for your wonderful comments. I have no doubt your son will know the best of your parents through you.
Dear Ally, I just read this older post and it touched me deeply. Your title tag, 'what we hold onto and what we release is everything.' I will reread it often, you embody a rare form of loving, what I think David below described well as 'bodhisattva-esque'. I am smiling with gentleness at your way of life and it deepens my belief we can be goodness. Thank you.
Thank you so much, Leslie. It was an intense few years. I’m actually headed to NY in about a week to bury my mother’s urn. I’ve already scattered some of her ashes in places I think she would have loved, but my stepdad wants to bury the rest. He’s my last living parent and I have POA once again, I have to laugh. And my son is heading to college Thursday, I’m heading there for move-in weekend. I guess my point is there’s so much loss at this time in life and I’m finding it’s a lot easier to accept that with love, patience, compassion and a sense of humor (sometimes gallows lol) than it is to fight. And it’s all “grist for the mill” one of my mother’s favorite expressions. Thanks so much for your kind comments. So appreciated ❤️
I hope you find many mercies on both journeys. I think gallows humor is closely connected to grace. Take good care.
Ally, so sorry for these losses. What an incredible story you have told. Thank you so much for writing all of this, every word.
Thank you for this incredibly balanced, bodhisattva-esque point-of-view.
I was so angry with my parents, while I lived with them, and for several decades thereafter.
They both left this world in a hurry, eight years ago. Three years after that, my child, their grandson, who will only know them through me (although he is rather psychic!) was born. Ah, yes, wow, I soon began to understand them a little better. Only lately have I begun to cease fighting with them in my head.
I love what you wrote about being gentle, letting go, forgiving. Those things are coming to me late in my story but, apparently, not too late!
I really understand what it’s like to be fighting with people in your head and how freeing it is when you don’t have to do that anymore. I feel my compassion for my mother grows all the time. My dad, not so much but I do hope he’s smacking his lips drinking coffee and having an Apple fritter somewhere out there :) Thanks again for your wonderful comments. I have no doubt your son will know the best of your parents through you.
That would be the goal! (And likewise for your children!)
Thanks so much, Ally.